Tuesday, September 23, 2003
I am sick of this old template. I’m beginning to hate the naked butt at the bottom of my page. My links are not updated. My description on the right is no longer apt. My prized possession is no longer a cam, but a Wilson. And please, I broke off with Stuart Townsend eons ago.
I hate this template. I want to change it into something better, more colors and less pretension. I want to make it easier to navigate.
Change. Sounds deliciously welcome.
***
Man, the Cosmopolitan Bachelor Bash was a great woman-power booster.
Felt wonderful to hoot, ogle and point at the men we want our moms to someday meet. Or at least, someone we want our beds to have. Every time the host introduced a new batch of fresh meat onstage, Jas, Irene and I hyperventilated. More 69 please!
I didn’t know when this happened, but
Ronron suddenly became a nerd. He just filled eight pages of his notebook with (gasp)
notes while the Cosmo event was ongoing. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Have to find a way to brainwash this kid.
***
Most of the time, my confidence is just fine. I can talk in public, go upstage, sing like crazy in a roomful of people without a needing a push from anyone.
There are cases, however, where a situation tests the values my kindergarten teacher taught me—everybody’s equal, all things are bright and beautiful, all creatures great and small, ‘cause the Lord God made them all.
I found myself in that situation last Thursday when every Barbie and Ken dolls of Cosmo-Manille (thank you, Maurice Arcache) gathered in one posh disco at some inaccessible street in Makati. I’ve never felt so obese, so short, so pimpled and so poor in my entire life! Yay! They all looked so flawless that my friend even wondered if they all go to the same dermatologist.
As a consolation, I guess, I told myself that at least I could come up with a complete sentence without using the words, “like,” “you know,” and “whatever!” And I know the names of my friends, talked to their folks, and know what they like and what they don’t.
Pero shet, sinong babae ba ang ayaw magkasya at magsuot ng isang Vera Wang?
***
Received an email sometime this week about how girlfriends are better than husbands.
I don’t have a husband, and I don’t intend to have one till the next five years or so. But I know why girlfriends are better than men.
1. Girlfriends forgive your mistakes if you tell them you just had PMS. Men would usually shrug it off as a lie and an excuse for a bad behavior, but a woman would understand. They’d know that hormones do go off uncontrollably, and no matter how many scientific researches (which were probably backed up by men) telling us otherwise, can change that fact. How can they claim they know better, when they have the inconvenience of having a flesh hang between their legs?
2. Girlfriends whine, wail and complain all the time. Which makes you realize how lucky you are with your own life until the time comes when it’s your turn to whine, wail and complain to make your girlfriend feel luckier.
3. You can borrow sanitary napkins from girlfriends.
4. Girlfriends will threaten wayward boyfriends for you.
5. You can go to a lingerie shop with them, compare cup sizes, and show off perfectly molded alabaster breasts without lecherous intents.
6. Girlfriends will teach you how to snare a guy you like.
7. Girlfriends will tell you if he’s a boyfriend material or just a f*ck buddy type.
8. They will support your dreams; encourage you when you need it and even when you don’t.
9. They’ll keep the secrets that you really want to remain hidden, and blab the rest to everyone willing to listen.
10. They’ll remember your birthdays even when you haven’t talked to them for months.
11. You’ll cry over the same movies (My Sassy Girl, Sweet November, Casablanca, the list goes forever) and hate the same movies (The Godfather, The Godfather II, The Godfather III)
12. They know how your mind works, so you don’t even bother lying to them. You just tell them out and out when you don’t like something, or you don’t want to go out.
13. They’ll protest over your evil schemes for about a minute, but will totally help you with the plans for the next hour.
14. You can share your dreams of the future with girlfriends. You can imagine how many children you will have (or the dogs you want to adopt), how the interior of your house would look like, and what parts of your body that you’d want to go through a knife, without them thinking you’re aiming for marriage.
15. If you lust after their husband, then they die an untimely death (which I’m sure, you have nothing to do with), they wouldn’t mind you sleeping with their widowers [Or at least, this applies to me and my best friend, hehehehe].
Girlfriends are the best! They rock, they rule, they conquer!
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