Ruth is a full-time writer. Foodie. Happy camper. Wanders a lot. Used to have the worst taste in men. A reformed swipe-a-holic. Reviving her blog after its death.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Accidental fan
The thing with Ronron and me is that when we both see each other after a long time, time flies so fast it’s like I always end up complaining about a day having only 24 hours in it.
“If I was heterosexual, we would’ve probably had sex,” he says. I agree. Plus we’d be perfect for each other because we’ll have intellectual, superficial, shallow, funny talks forever.
Wherever we go, people look at us. Yes, we know we’re pretty, but it’s the extremely loud conversations about dildos and vibrators that would catch other people’s attention.
“Ronron, keep your voice down, they’re staring at us,” I would say horrified.
”So what?” He’ll answer defiantly. And then in a loud singsong voice he’d say, “DILDO! DILDO! DILDO!”
And people would just stare at us like we were aliens who had the gall to talk about sex on the streets.
When we go to press conferences together and I say that I need to powder my nose and put some makeup on, he’d ask if he could come with me so I could apply makeup on him.
And I will. He would behave so nicely. Press his eyes shut while I powder him; suck in his cheeks so I could put a blush on; and look critically in the mirror while I comb his hair neatly.
Of course, it’s not our problem if waiters thought we did something nasty inside the bathroom for the past fifteen minutes.
Today he convinced me to attend this dinner with author and humorist David Sedaris (namedropping I am loving). Because it was an intimate dinner and seats were limited, I had to ask former Saturday Boss if I could go. He said yes and Ron and I were ecstatic.
Then I got worried. Oh. My. God. I don’t know who the hell David Sedaris is. I know Mela has been blabbing about him for the past month or so. And that she was the one who designed the posters and the tickets and all the stuff marketing people do. But that’s all I know about him.
I am an illiterate! It was so embarrassing.
Ron consoled me by saying that we’re smart people and the worst thing that could happen to us is that Sedaris will write about “two stupid Filipino journalists who didn’t know what to ask” in The New Yorker.
He was described by both Mela and him as “think Jessica Zafra, only he’s gay, American, and lives in Paris.”
Okay. Jessica Zafra? I love her and I am a fan, but I am petrified of her. During her book signings I am always reduced to a blathering idiot.
I get to eat with someone like Zafra? Are you kidding me? Of course I’m scared.
Then other people from the press came pouring in and they’ve all read one book of his or another, and they began to talk about it. Throwing some information about him one after another without even reading the press kit and I’m like…”What have I gotten myself into?”
Then Sedaris walked in. He was wearing a white long sleeved polo shirt and baggy khaki pants. He looked so… ordinary. He’s not even tall. I thought that if I saw him on the street, I wouldn’t notice him. He started talking and we started laughing. The other press people started asking him questions and I was so quiet the whole time, admiring his brilliance and witticism.
For almost two hours I met and interacted with one of the most interesting person I’ll ever meet in my entire life (yes, I got around to asking him a few questions myself. I can’t say for sure if he thought they were stupid.).
I like the way he travels. He wants to experience the country he’s visiting and not just be inside the bus. He, Mela and I could be travel buddies. Us girls could provide the research and info about the country, he could provide the laughs.
I like him. (And I would’ve written so much about him in this blog too if I didn’t have to write about him for our paper)
So there, buy his book. I know I’ll be buying his.
Mela met us after the dinner and told us that Sedaris said we looked like we had fun, or if we didn’t we were good at pretending like we were having fun.
Ron and I just had a great laugh about it. Yes, we were able to pass ourselves off among the readers and the fans. We were a success!
We celebrated by talking colegiala all the way to the parking lot. Meaning we peppered our sentences with “It’s like… you knows?” and “Ohmigods!”
3 Comments:
amen to that! it's a a pity though that i hardly see mine...so david sedaris huh? i could use new books. maybe i'll check him out one of these days.
p.s. i actually find that part where you wrote aout your friend chanting 'dildo' repeatedly hilarious. ewan ko ba. (--,)
I don't mind talking about dildos too... Kaya lang, waaah! andaming taong nakakarinig eh. Haay. Maybe, am getting older.
Yep, read Sedaris. Very funny! PErfect kasi powersale sa powerbooks.
I don't mind talking about dildos too... Kaya lang, waaah! andaming taong nakakarinig eh. Haay. Maybe, am getting older.
Yep, read Sedaris. Very funny! PErfect kasi powersale sa powerbooks.
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